Mary Fletcher looked out of the window of the large house she shared with her husband and her son. Charles was due home from school soon, with his end of term report. She felt nervous although, she supposed, it wasn’t that important. He was obviously going to inherit the Estate, being the only son, and he had enough wits about him to know how to run it well. It was the people skills he lacked.
She heard the ringing of bicycle bells before the two boys came into sight at the end of the lane, pedalling frantically as they always did, racing to be the first to reach the large Estate gates. Both boys had dark, short hair, as was the style of the day; they were of similar height; both dressed identically in their black school blazers and grey shorts. They looked more like brothers than friends. She wondered idly whether anyone else in the village noticed their similarity, or remarked, in the pub or, perhaps in the butchers, on how much the Fletcher boy looked like the Mitchell boy.
Mary walked from the lounge through the hall to the kitchen, with its high ceiling and large wooden table in the centre. The back door was flung open, and the boys spilled in, kicking off their boots onto the brick floor and charging over to the pantry where the fresh milk was kept. They grabbed mugs from the wooden shelves and poured out the milk, chattering and giggling together.
‘Where is it then?’ Mary asked.
The boys looked up, suddenly noticing her presence. Charles frowned, then ran over to where he had thrown his leather satchel. Undoing the strap, he took out a crumpled brown envelope, addressed to ‘Mr and Mrs Fletcher’ and handed it to his mother. Mary smiled.
‘Thank you, Charles. Has your mother seen your report yet, David?’
David shook his head. ‘She’s not very well again, Dad says I’m not to trouble her with it.’
‘Tell your father to let me know if there’s anything I can do. Well, boys, off you go then, it’s time you went outside and played.’
Once peace had returned to the house, Mary lit an Embassy and took the school report through to the lounge. Pausing only to make herself a gin and tonic, she settled down on the sofa to read what the teachers of Bentley Primary School
***
Charles Fletcher (aged 8 ½) was apparently a star pupil in History and English lessons, showing flair and imagination in essays, with a good knowledge of recent history. His skill in Mathematics was adequate and he was showing some ability in geography, correctly identifying many countries and capital cities in the recent test. Sport was a let-down, but then, Mary reasoned, no-one thought for a moment that they could earn a living from sport. His class teacher was content with the level of diligence being shown, although it was felt that Charles would benefit from being more tolerant of his classmates and not being quite so eager to judge them. He apparently held very strong views on all kinds of subjects, which he was only too keen to impart to others. However, it seemed that, with a bit of pressure from the teachers and slightly more effort on the boy’s part, a career in politics might be beckoning.
Smiling, Mary folded the report and put it back into the envelope.
***
The sub-plot is set some thirty years earlier than the main story and explores the relationship between Cassie’s father, David, and Charles Fletcher, who becomes an MP.
Ah, I see, a sub-plot set in the past. I think you're going to need to distinguish this from a flashback, which is slightly different, but it's a good idea. The flashback is used to provide information (in a dramatic form) that is crucial for the main plot. Thus it isnt particularly independent. The flashback may also suffer from the danger of not having much drama, because in a sense 'we already know what happens' in the future. But if you can develop the characters fully enough there's no reason (a la French Lieutenant's Woman) that this approach might not be fruitful. The only thing I would caution you on is that the world of your subplot so far seems a little too comfy - some elements of danger, character flaw, potential upheaval are already present (he seems to quick to judge etc) but something more concrete - an incident of some kind, perhaps in a separate note that falls out of the report - would be more immediately involving for the reader.
ReplyDeleteI always like the mood and atmosphere you create Julie. The people and the scenes are credible and interesting. Clever device going back in time to create a sub-plot. PETER
ReplyDeleteYou set the time perfectly with some nice little references. The leather satchel, the milk in the pantry. ......and of course, the Embassy as she settles down to read his report. Lovely.
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